Wedding Day Spanx

Two weeks until I marry the fiance!  We finally spent a few hours yesterday getting things done to prepare for the day.  My Spanx also arrived.

This is (was) my very first pair of Spanx.  I knew the fiance would be less than thrilled so I didn’t tell him.  Unfortunately I did not think ahead and have them shipped to my office rather than the house.  And of course they arrived when he was home and I was not.  I walked in the door yesterday morning and heard this.

The fiance: Why did you buy Spanx? *very accusatory tone*
Me: To wear under my wedding dress.
The fiance: NOOOOO!!!!!
Me: The dress is sheer!  I have to wear something.
The fiance: Well wear something more attractive.  Like a wrestling suit.

Turns out that he is right. They are pretty freakin’ hideous.  I waited until he fell asleep last night to try them on.  I snuck in the guest room and pulled out the Spanx and the dress.  Boy, those things are awkward!  Then I tiptoed into the bathroom to look in the full length mirror.  They didn’t make a damn difference!  Where is the smoothing and shaping?  I was expecting to see an itty bitty waist and round thing in… well not exactly that, but something more Kim Kardashian-ish.  Instead it was just me wearing a really ugly piece of lingerie.  They are now neatly repacked in their box with a return label.  The fiance won and I will be spending the afternoon looking for a wrestling suit.

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